Funny how I only seem to use this thing when I need to rant about something.
>> and, once again, I'm ranting about..........................family issues. Issues that turn up every day, every minute, every friggin second of this hell of my life.
The main cause of all my issues I have today.
I'll probably write more in a little bit when I get back on in the morning.
There's a lot to say about this situation that I'd LIKE to get out right now, but she's practically over my shoulder so...........
............even though I'd LOVE for her to read just what I say about her every day.
Tue, Apr. 5th, 2005, 03:28 pm
Infuriated doesn't even BEGIN to describe it. I swear, I can't WAIT for these two years to go by so I can get the fuck away from this house.
As much as I love my mom, brother, and sister, it'll only be so long until calm, silent me bursts and I HURT somefuckingbody. I really just cannot deal with them anymore. Just 2 years. I'm about to start counting down to the FUCKING DAY I turn 18 and my ass is out of here. I must have all the patience in the world dealing with them all these years and still not setting off.
Hypocrites -- the whole lot of them.
Once before, I was angry that I'm the oldest, thus more is expected of my but now...I'm fucking glad I'm the oldest. That means I'll be free ASAP.
I was going to go to Michigan State University for college in two years, but now I feel even that's too close to my current home in New Jersey. I'll be packed even before I'm 18 and out the fucking house as soon I possible. I hope to get into an animation/art/game designing school in California, all the way on the other side of the country.
Maybe if I'm not grouchy, I'll come home for Christmas.
That's definitely not a positive.
There is just way too much here in this house for me to fuckin deal with. Not to mention my mom's forcing me to go to therapy to save her ass from DYFS. They're making me go and I really DONT need it, nor do I want it. You'd think they'd notice they're bringing up memories I stored in the back of my mind as another chapter in this hell called life.
And it'd be so 'wrong' if I were to tell my therapist just HOW pissed off my mom and my brother made me today, wouldn't it?
As a matter of fact, that's just what I'm going to do.
I don't care how mad it will make my mom, if I gotta talk to the happy bitch then that's what I do. That's what therapy is for right?
Now I'M in fucking trouble with my mom because my brother wanted to argue with me over the computer and I'm not getting off.
Oh yeah, smack me over a computer but let the boy get off with threatening to kill me in my sleep.
If anything, he should be in intensive anger management or he might just kill somebody some day. That's what I think.
But hey...who cares what a non-stereotypical, 15-year-old black girl has to say anyway, hm?
Sat, Mar. 26th, 2005, 06:27 pm
*sigh* Good day gone terrible.
1) I was gonna get out the house and go over a friend's house. She had something to do.
2) XD I was gonna watch that episode of Good Eats I recorded. My sister deleted it.
3) I'm the dork watching Avatar: The Last Airbender
4) I lost a few things that I desperately need right now for my upcomin online manga.
5) Took some pictures and my mom got mad.
@__@ wee! Fun, no?
XD Not to mention I took some test that basically called me stoopid! I got low scores on the beginner and intermediate levels, but really high ones on the advanced ones! How strange is that? Does that mean I'm dumb or smart?
XD Good news is mah Sparklyspark showed me some amusing clips from the fics she's been reading all day.
Bad aspect of the week in total?
I was supposed to be going to North Carolina to stay with my best friend for a few days for her birthday, but the airline tickets suddenly skyrocketed and........yeah. So no North Carolina for me.
But my mom's taking me to get my ear pierced again (maybe) next week, so I guess that counts as good news? Not to mention I absolutely HAVE to accessorize. I have no accessories worth wearing in my closet! Claire's has some good stuff stored in the corner (where all the punk stuff is).
I made a cool banner of myself with some pictures taken from my mom's camera phone. XD Mom wont let me post it anywhere though. She says my boobs are showing too much in one of the pictures.
*whisper*It's my deviantART ID*whisper*
It was mighty pretty.
Ummm.....lessee........I was listening to Anime Academy Radio (still am btw) and they played the theme song to Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater, thus I suddenly have the urge to go play it. XD My friend let me borrow it in January and he hasnt gotten it back yet. MUWAHAHAHAHa.
On other notice....
I desperately want a PSP.
O.O They're pretty much like.....sold out! And super expensive....but I WANT IT! <<; And if my mom buys it for us, then I'll have to share.
I hate sharing.
I'm very selfish with my possessions.
T_T Just like as soon as Kingdom Hearts 2 comes out, I'M buying it before my mom does. Thus: It's my property and I dont have to share.
Good logic right?
Anyway, I'm outtie. Dont feel like rambling anymore.
|yajiru is poisonous! Induce vomitting if ingested.|
I'm poinsonous....bite me.
Sat, Jan. 8th, 2005, 02:03 pm
New LJ for me people~! Yesh! XD! << Deleted my old one....I'm a NEW WOMAN!!!!